Sunday, April 10, 2005

The truth comes out.

Returning to Toronto to visit family and friends is always a fun-filled, whirlwind experience, and this trip so far has been no exception. I arrived early Saturday morning, half-dead from the turbulent overnight flight, and after a much-needed nap, headed to the west end of the city for a relaxing family lunch. It was there that I found out what my sister Vicky truly thinks of me.

I am the wacky one, the black sheep, the presumed "mailman's kid", that doesn't look or act anything like the rest of the extended family. I march to the beat of a different drummer, and am well aware that many family members don't truly understand what makes me tick. But that's ok with me. I like being a trailblazer, an innovator, and wouldn't have it any other way.

Vicky is a real fan of TLC, especially those decorating shows and similar reality TV offerings. So much so, that she has started a campaign to have our family represented in the world of unscripted television. She decided that I was the perfect candidate to accomplish this feat.

As such, my darling sister has nominated me for the show "What Not to Wear."

Not once, but three times.

Jigga Wha !?!?

Ok, I admit it, my favorite attire consists of athletic pants and shirts, running shoes, and quite often, baseball hats. I like that stuff. It's not like I'm 'hiding' who I am - I'm expressing who I am. I have never had the need for makeup or pedicures, and will fight to the death anyone who dares come near my body with depilatory hot wax. (I still to this day have no idea how women tolerate that particular method of hair removal. Yikes.)

Apparently, my dear sister submitted photographs of me in my favorite attire (see below pull-up contest entry for an example), as well as pictures of me in my Halloween costume, the same costume I wore to Bay to Breakers last year. Of course, she made it clear that I wore that costume to work, on Halloween, as if that was a bad thing. Boy, tough crowd !

Well, at least I now know what the family really thinks of me and my eccentricities. :)

Should I feel flattered, or insulted ? I haven't decided yet. It certainly is not the most uplifting experience to be paraded in front of living rooms across America as the shining example of WHAT NOT TO WEAR. On the other hand, I may be able to handle that kind of humiliation for a new $5,000 wardrobe courtesy of the show.

But I think it will take much more than that to get me in a pair of heels.

TLC, are you listening ? :)


Blogger Kris said...

Nothing wrong with that "sporty" look! It's actually kinda hot. The funny thing is when it comes to clothes, the worst dress person is often someone who dresses badly, but doesn't realise it. If getting all dolled up everyday isn't your style, there's nothing wrong with that, but thinking that white socks go with black dress slacks and black shoes...that's just wrong, haha.

April 24, 2005 at 11:51:00 AM PDT  

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